When my preference becomes my prison
Preaching Outline on 1 Samuel 16:1 – The Lord said to Samuel, “How long will you grieve over Saul? I have rejected him as king of Israel. Fill a horn with oil and go to Bethlehem; I will send it to Jesse. I have chosen one of his sons to make him king.
Target: When we cling more to our personal preferences than to God’s promises, we get stuck in places where we should never have stayed. Saul represents human preferences, not God’s promise.
“But the people wouldn’t listen to Samuel’s warning: ‘No, we want a king,’ they said. And the Lord replied: ‘Grant their request and give them a king.’ So Samuel agreed and sent the people back home.” -1 Samuel 8:19,22 NIV
If I want to free myself from the prison of preference, I need…
Development
1. Being honest about the TIME spent on my grief
It’s not the POSTURE of mourning that God questions, but the PERIOD of mourning.
■ “How long…?” -1 Samuel 16:1 NIV
Grieving is a normal part of human life. When we lose something or someone, we cry, we feel pain and we seek space to process it. But there is a difference between mourning with purpose and using mourning as an excuse to stand still. Grieving for too long ends up trapping us in emotional cycles that hinder our spiritual growth. It’s like dwelling on something that has already been overcome by God.
Regret is human. Lamenting for too long is immature.
The Bible calls us to cry, to feel and to give space to sadness, but not to live in it indefinitely. The problem begins when mourning becomes a prison, a way of avoiding moving on. God wants us to use mourning as a bridge, not a cell. He asks, “How long will you keep looking back?” (1 Samuel 16:1). In other words, how long will we allow our pain to prevent us from seeing what He is doing ahead of us?
For example, think of Moses in the desert. He spent years frustrated, complaining about the situation he was in. But God had bigger plans for him. It was only after Moses agreed to leave his self-pity zone that God used him to free an entire people. This teaches us that, while we are stuck in the past, God is waiting to work in the present.
2. Remember what God TOLD ME
“I rejected Saul as king.” -1 Samuel 16:1 NIV
Saul was the choice of men, but David was God’s choice. As much as the people insisted on putting Saul on the throne, God had already revealed that he would not be the ideal leader for Israel. And here’s the crucial point: we often continue to cling to things that God has already told us are not good for us. Maybe it’s a relationship, a career, a city, or even a mindset that no longer fits our life.
When things don’t go our way, we tend to blame Satan for things that God is doing.
It’s easy to confuse God’s plans with attacks from the enemy. If something doesn’t go according to plan, we immediately think: “Oh, the devil is against me!” But isn’t God actually trying to get us out of a place that no longer serves us? He may be preparing something much better, but we have to trust him to see it.
“…Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God.” -Matthew 4:4 NIV
This means that instead of living based on our emotions or preferences, we need to live based on what God has already said. He has already told us that he has good plans for us (Jeremiah 29:11). He has already assured us that all things work together for good for those who love God (Romans 8:28). So why do we insist on clinging to what has already passed?
3. To consistently TURN to God, not to the past
Therefore, since we are surrounded by a great cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside everything that hinders us and the sin that entangles us, and let us run with perseverance the race that is set before us. -Hebrews 12:1 NIV
God is not interested in looking back with us. He wants us to move forward, towards what he has prepared. When Samuel was still stuck in mourning for Saul, God intervened and said: “No more mourning for Saul. I have rejected him as king of Israel. Fill a horn with oil and go to Bethlehem, for I have chosen one of Jesse’s sons to be king.” (1 Samuel 16:1 NVT)
➢ Don’t say: “Why were the days of the past better than today?” For it’s not wise to ask like that. -Ecclesiastes 7:10
This mentality of glorifying the past is a trap. As Warren Wiersbe once said: “The ‘good old days’ are a combination of bad memory and good imagination.” We can’t compare the present with distorted versions of the past. That only prevents us from enjoying the now and building the future.
Also, remember that God is always calling us to new seasons. He doesn’t want us to get stuck in emotional or spiritual deserts. Each new chapter in our story is an opportunity to learn more about who He is and how He works.
Final Lesson: In Christ, every end is the beginning of something better.
You may be going through a difficult phase right now, perhaps even feeling trapped by your own preferences or the weight of something that has already ended. But here’s the truth: God doesn’t finish anything without starting something new. Every door that closes is because he is opening another one. Every end is actually a new beginning.
So do your part: release what needs to be released, trust in what God has already said and move on. No matter how difficult it may seem right now, God’s promise is clear: He always has something better in store for those who trust in Him.
Stop looking back. Stop holding on to what no longer serves you. Today is the day to move forward, to turn your attention to God and allow Him to take you to the next level.
Preaching Outline on 1 Samuel 16:1 – The Lord said to Samuel, “How long will you grieve over Saul? I have rejected him as king of Israel. Fill a horn with oil and go to Bethlehem; I will send it to Jesse. I have chosen one of his sons to make him king.
More Preaching Outlines
- Past, forget it – Genesis 41:51-52
- Isaiah 45:2-3 – I will go before you
- 2 Samuel 14:3-6 – You have no one to listen to you
